A sad and somber Goin’ Deep Show front office has confirmed that Mr. Kleen took his own life on Sunday after dealing with third degree burns over most of his hands and arms from a freak waterheater accident. Kleen was overheard screaming at the top of his lungs “I’ll never masterbate again!!!!” The thought of such a drastic change in lifestyle must have been too much for Kleen. This morning his wife of only a few months found him with two magic erasers jammed in his mouth along with 3 dozen shots of Oxyclean on an end table next to a huge bottle of Jergens. The shockwave of losing Kleen almost sent a ripple through Crump, MI but most people didn’t know who the hell he was and since he hasn’t been seen or heard from for nearly a month no one really cared. Those close to Kleen are comforted by the fact that today is Opening night of baseball and that should make everyone feel better. Stay tuned for more memories of Mr. Kleen as his ghost is expected to make some appearances on the Goin’ Deep Show.
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